The Ol' Switcheroo.

Here comes Slotnick. Mrs. Slotnick, that is. Do the ol' switcheroo with the "l" and the "n" and we get a more appropriate name: Snotlick. The most fitting name for a crappy substitute teacher ever, or at least I think it's the best there is. Actually, if you know of a better one, I will buy you some ice cream. Two scoops. No more. And it has to be from Thrifty. None of that fancy stuff with the crumbled cookies, cake batter, butter, pancakes, dough, cheese, and other additional hydrogenated heart-stoppers shoveled in on a marble slab. That ice cream coats your digestive system with a milky glue from mouth to anus. Anyway, Thrifty ice cream is what I would be willing to buy for you upon hearing a better name than Mrs. Slotnick. Snotlick with the ol' switcheroo. Two scoops.